Wednesday, June 4, 2014

#ChooseJoy #JoyGivers365 Weeks 16-22

I was all set to write up a post-Easter blog about choosing joy over the first Holiday without my Grams and how emotional it was to realize she was in Heaven with Jesus celebrating his Death and Resurrection IN PERSON.

And then... I injured my upper back and neck.

And I still have no clue how.

What I do know is that for 2 1/2 weeks I suffered from worse than ever before migraines and terrible back pain.

I practically lived at my chiropractors. No joke. I would have slept there if they had let me.

After my last apt (of 7930487930742) I felt good! 

For about a day.

And then I got the Stomach Flu.

(Or so I thought)

It was terrible.

After 2 days barfing, fever, and dizziness, I thought I was getting better.

And then it came back.

Worse than before.

Way worse.

And then I got to ride in an Ambulance to the emergency room.

That was fun.

I think. 

I don't really know, as I passed out during part of it.

The Dr told me I had at least 4 more days of the sickness. 

I wanted to punch him.

I would have if I could have moved at all without throwing up.

I spent the next week+ at my parents trying to fight off my sickness and then recover.

It was not fun. To say the least.

I distinctly remember laying on my parents couch on a Sunday afternoon.  Being on day 6 of vomiting, trying so desperately not to throw up, with a fan hurricane blast on my face, and quite frankly smelling a bit, ok alot, because I had been too sick and weak to shower for days.( Yes, days. ) I thought to myself "God, I REAALLYY don't know how i'm going to choose joy over this! I am done! I can't handle anymore! MAKE.THIS.STOP!" (spoiler-he didn't)

I couldn't think of one good or joyful thing about the whole nightmare.

Until I thought...

"Well, at least I'm losing weight"

Granted, I would have rather stuck to the healthier eating plan I had adapted in my life than to the barfing my guts out diet plan, but it was the best I could come up with at the moment!

It's been about 3 weeks since I got sick and I am still not back to my normal self. Applesauce and Saltines are still on the daily menu, and I am get tired very easily. It's taking awhile to build back up my strength and stomach very much solid food.

But through this all, there is joy to be found. I'm grateful, SO grateful, that my parents were able to take me home and take care of me. I'm even more joyful that God protected them from this illness.

I choose joy that even though I deal with a chronic health condition and got this crazy viral infection from who knows where, that it could be worse. It could be much worse. Even though the past month has been horrible, it's been one month. Some people spend entire years, lifetimes, feeling as bad as I did in one month. Having loved ones who have suffered from cancer, I have seen it first hand.

So while I still struggle to regain my strength and feel good, I choose joy.

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